#23: Chicago

New York is too expensive. New Jersey's cool, but the only major city is Newark and that's too scary. Houston's too black. L.A.'s too gay, and Miami is too Cuban. What American city, then, do Indians like? Obviously, Chicago.

Home to financial firms, consulting outfits and numerous universities, Chicago is prime for cultivating a thriving Indian scene. Whether you're a bankster in Bucktown, an M.D. in Streeterville, an undergrad in Hyde Park or an M.B.A. in Evanston this City of Big Shoulder Bags has everything an Indian could want.

Between M&A's, Organic Chem. labs, Intros to Tort Reform and Material Science problem sets, Indians in Chicago have plenty of opportunities to fill their time. In case hunger hits they can stroll down the Magnificent Mile to Food Life in the Water Tower where they can wait in a long line for bad pizza. Or they could head uptown to Devon and spend 45 minutes double parking for a Masala dosa at Udupi Palace.

After snacks and a quick stop by Old Orchard for a fresh button down from Club Monaco, Indians in Chicago are ready to hit up the town. First, they'll usually get things started with a pregame in Lincoln Park at a place like The Apartment. At this point, many Indians will get text messages from other Indians telling them to head further downtown to a club where one of their peripheral friends is spinning, or DJ'ing. This club will most likely go by one name, such as Sauce, Funk, Transit, Rouge, Zentra, Circus, Karma, or Blonde.

After they are good and sweaty, Indians will argue with cab drivers outside the club to fit a fifth person into the back seat. They will then head up to the Gold Coast for after hours fun at an establishment like Leg Room or McFadddens. At this point, Indian girls will focus on dancing with each other or making out with a guy either two years older or two years younger than them. Indian guys, on the other hand, will be trying to either bum cigarettes or free style rap on the sidewalk with homeless men.

Afterwards they will go to Rock 'n Roll McDonalds before heading home and drunkenly messaging each other on Facebook about how much they love Chicago.