Wednesday, March 19, 2008

#87: Stealing Tabasco Sauce From Chipotle

Indians like spicy food. Open up the medicine cabinet of any Indian, check out their plentiful stock of Immodium tablets, and you'll understand this. Venture into the kitchen and any persistent doubts will be addressed. There are peppers in the fridge, taco bell fire sauce packets in the drawer and in the cupboard, standing at attention like a captured POW showing courage under fire, a bottle of the green tabasco sauce they stole from the fast food chain Chipotle.

The phenomenon of tabasconapping is a confluence of two Indian quirks: a proclivity for spicy fare and thrift. If you put something spicey in front of an Indian and turn your back, they will steal it. I even saw an Indian kid pocket a CD at Best Buy just because it said Red Hot Chilli Peppers on it.

Don't believe me that Indians love spicing their food so much that they'd resort to theft? Try this. If you're ever at Pizza Hut with a group of Indian friends or family members, casually mention that they're out of crushed red pepper. "Nothing to make this slice of vegetarian delight hotter on my tongue?" they'll shout. "Nothing to steal and hide in my pantry?" they'll exclaim. "Get in the car," someone will finally say, "I think there's an Uno's down the street."

So next time you're at Chipotle waiting 35 minutes in a line for your burrito bowl keep an eye on the number of tabasco bottles (y) at the condiment station. Then count the number of Indians (x) in front of you. If at any point x>y, get your burrito to go. Chipotle may be out of hot sauce but there's plenty in your cupboards back at home.


Subhash said...

People will take the bottle thats the most empty. Lets not get carried away.

And why do you have to make stereotypical "Indian in the Cupboard" References?

All you guys are, are a bunch of stereotypes.

Hey, i wear a turban!!! COMEDY!!!

get a life and a job.

Mihir said...

A guess here, but Subash has his pagdi tied a bit too tight...

Mahotma in Herre said...

Oh snap! In yo' face, macaca!

aliya said...

boy was my comp-sci/applied-math-ass ever relieved to see things in terms of variables x and y.

Also, tiefing the emptiest bottle is just stupid. barely worth the gas money. and you call yourself an indian. for shame!

whordeboryeeeat said...

you tiefs have no honor (whoever catches the reference wins)

dbals said...

Not sure it's true, but funny.

Dinesh said...

this is hilarious. I'm Indian (South Indian to be precise, and crazy proud of it). I got off work from the hospital yesterday dead tired and went to chipotle to get a burrito bowl to go. I saw tabasco on the table that I placed in my scrubs pocket (by my knee), and was just gonna sprinkle some on it when I got to the the register and be on my way when I decided I'll just take the bottle home and sprinkle it on it when I get there. I didn't think anyone else would steal a tabasco bottle then I see ur blog lol. And I'm not ashamed to say it, but everything here is true, there has to be either crushed red pepper or tabasco, and the thai restaurants need to get my level of spice just right or I'll yelp about how crappy the place is. BROWN POWER :D

adham said...

شركة نقل اثاث بالدمام التفاؤل شركة نقل اثاث بالخبر كما انها افضل شركة نقل اثاث بالجبيل نقل عفش واثاث بالجبيل والخبر والقطيف والدمام
شركة نقل اثاث بالدمام
شركة نقل اثاث بالجبيل
شركة نقل اثاث بالقطيف

adham said...

شركة نقل عفش بالمدينة المنورة
شركة نقل عفش بجدة
شركة نقل عفش بمكة
شركة نقل عفش بالطائف
نقل العفش والتخزين
شركة نقل عفش بالمدينة المنورة
شركة نقل عفش بالمدينة المنورة
شركة نقل عفش بالرياض
شركة نقل عفش بينبع
شركة نقل عفش بالدمام
شركة نقل عفش

adham said...

اهم شركات كشف تسربات المياه بالدمام كذلك معرض اهم شركة مكافحة حشرات بالدمام والخبر والجبيل والخبر والاحساء والقطيف كذكل شركة تنظيف خزانات بجدة وتنظيف بجدة ومكافحة الحشرات بالخبر وكشف تسربات المياه بالجبيل والقطيف والخبر والدمام
شركة تنظيف خزانات بجدة
شركة مكافحة حشرات بالدمام
شركة كشف تسربات المياه بالدمام

adham said...

اهم شركات نقل العفش والاثاث بالدمام والخبر والجبيل اولقطيف والاحساء والرياض وجدة ومكة المدينة المنورة والخرج والطائف وخميس مشيط وبجدة افضل شركة نقل عفش بجدة نعرضها مجموعة الفا لنقل العفش بمكة والخرج والقصيم والطائف وتبوك وخميس مشيط ونجران وجيزان وبريدة والمدينة المنورة وينبع افضل شركات نقل الاثاث بالجبيل والطائف وخميس مشيط وبريدة وعنيزو وابها ونجران المدينة وينبع تبوك والقصيم الخرج حفر الباطن والظهران
شركة نقل عفش بالرياض
شركة نقل عفش بالطائف
شركة نقل عفش بالدمام
شركة نقل عفش بجدة
شركة نقل عفش بمكة
شركة نقل عفش بالمدينة المنورة
شركة نقل عفش بينبع
شركة نقل عفش بالخرج
شركة نقل عفش بالقصيم
شركة نقل عفش بخميس مشيط
شركة نقل عفش بتبوك
شركة نقل عفش بابها
شركة نقل عفش ببريدة
شركة نقل عفش بنجران
شركة نقل عفش بحائل
شركة نقل عفش بالظهران
شركة نقل عفش واثاث
شركة نقل عفش

chenmeinv0 said...

sac longchamp
adidas yeezy
calvin klein
polo ralph lauren
tory burch
canada goose outlet
seattle seahawks jerseys
ray ban sunglasses
adidas outlet
retro jordans

jeje said...

michael kors factory outlet
nike huarache
adidas nmd
adidas yeezy
nike zoom
adidas superstar
michael kors outlet
vans shoes
supreme clothing
balenciaga sneakers

Cara menyembuhkan cacar air said...

Thanks a lot of admin already give the information and sorry here we permit the article share may be useful and help you :

Obat tradisional anemia
Obat infeksi saluran pernafasan
Obat amandel bengkak

raybanoutlet001 said...

michael kors handbags
coach outlet
bills jerseys
polo ralph lauren
cheap nhl jerseys
tods outlet
air huarache
ugg outlet
soccer shoes
kate spade outlet

weijian chen said...

cheap jordans
adidas superstar
nike flyknit
moncler jackets
jordan 11 retro
russell westbrook shoes
yeezy boost 700
nike huarache
adidas superstar shoes
basketball shoes

Cara menyembuhkan infeksi paru paru said...

thank you very useful information admin, and pardon me permission to share articles here may help :

Obat herbal mata lelah
Obat asam lambung naik ampuh
Obat herbal malaria
Obat batuk rejan ampuh
Cara mengatasi kerutan di wajah
Cara menyembuhkan kanker serviks
Cara menyembuhkan ginjal bengkak

Zihan Amelia said...

Permission to share friends, articles about health and hopefully useful for all

Obat Panu
Cara Mengobati Cacar Air
Obat Pelancar Haid Alami
Obat Susah Kencing
Cara Menghilangkan Nyeri Dan Pegal Di Lutut

easy your sustenance said...

I can only express a word of thanks. Because with the content on this blog I can add knowledge I, thank has been sharing this information. Do not forget to visit our website to share information and knowledge about health. |
obat penyakit hisprung |
obat batuk herbal |
cara mengatasi penyakit ispa |
cara mengobati ambeien |
obat jantung berdebar

Lutfi Kurniawan said...

이렇게 헤어져야 한대도 나는 늘 이 자리에 있을게 이게 우리의 마지막 이래도 맘속엔 늘 내가 자릴 지킬게 Cara Mengobati Tukak Lambung Cara Mengobati Sinusitis Cara Mengobati Gusi Bengkak Cara Menghilangkan Benjolan Di Ketiak