#111: Entry By Tears

Developed in Mohenjo-Daro, the ancient art of Entry By Tears (EBT) has been a well-kept Indian secret for centuries. I read somewhere that Asoka himself employed this technique to get himself onto the Magadha State University's basketball team. A powerful weapon indeed.

What is it, you ask? This is best illustrated by a completely fictional example:

Let's say we have a girl named Deepa. Lives somewhere in the midwest. Has a demanding mother who serves as the hard-ass judge in local maths competitions. The father's probably more laid-back, working with sinusoidal oscillations during the week, and yelling, "Micropone!" during Puja functions.

Deepa's certainly a bright student, but with the stringent academic demands placed on her, it is a tall order to fulfill parental expectations. Luckily for her though, she happened upon that Asoka biography mentioned earlier. This will come in handy for her.

Because it just so happens that her Physics final didn't go so well. A possible A-minus in the class. Valedictorian dreams shattered. The slow head-shake from the parents. Faux-sympathy from the community. What is a girl to do?

Deepa knows she only has one chance. She meets with her bitter, nicotine-infused teacher (Mr. Keltywerder) to discuss her final grade, asking if there's anything in the world she can do to raise her grade to a safe level. As Mr. Keltywerder begins to reply in the negative, out comes a tear. Then another. And another. Between sobs, Deepa forces out her story about how much pressure she's under, culminating into the full Asoka-powered bawl-a-thon, opening up a lacrimal monsoon, drowning poor Mr. Keltywerder.

Deepa walks out with an A in Physics.

Fast forward a year or so. We find that Deepa is informed that she did not get into, say, Stanford. Tough break, right? But in the subsequent fall semester, she's somehow a Cardinal.

You fill in the gap.