#e^(iπ) +1: Crazy Punjabi Girls That Ruin it For the Nice Ones

...nah, all y'all crazy albiet, beautiful.

Blogs used to be about feelings or as a DC sage (not necessarily gilbert arenas) puts it, "Fillens." Anyway, I'm going to brain vomit a story. Here's a little a something and it goes like this: Punjabi girls are crazy. Sorry ricky I know i'm just re-iterating a theme, but I'm not as smart as you. Run through any woods lately?

But seriously, they are batting near 1.000 for unsolicted craziness. Why is this?


Sorry about that. I had to take an important phone call from my friends who had warned me not to drink St. Pauli's Girl. Sorry, I didn't listen to you. Well, not really because this was the most memorable birthday a man-boy could have hoped for.


Anyway......

Crazy shines in a spectrum. Sometimes, it comes in 5 spectrums and really messes with one's head, but for our purposes (I'm still attemping to sleep today), there's a continuum of crazy. There's blue-crazy that makes Punjabi girls shout out of windows to police officers for no reason. There's green-crazy that presents itself in a situatinon where a Punjabi girl asserts, to a bartender, "hey, i'm a sociopath." Yellow-crazy makes Punjabi girls run off of buses, but as orange gives way to red, the harmless colors of crazy turn malicious. We should always listen to George Bluth Sr. because its true. You do not trust crazy, especially twice.

Examples of red crazy:

1. Emails, with subject line: Marry ME!
2. A series of Facebook wall-posts declaring the end of a friendship
3. Filling a Punjabi girl's head with evil thoughts until she has no alternative but to create a series of Facebook wall-posts declaring the end of a friendship
4. Stealing keys that have no use to the thief
5. Stealing a computer that has no use to the thief
6. Dumping water and shorting out another computer that was just trying to make it one more year (Good thing I backed up my hard drive last week. Not to mention I'm stacked with strictly bangers from 1999 to 2004. Anyone looking for Abyss - "Catch-22"?)
7. Slapping each other. Can anyone look to see if that lovely girl who slapped dude in the video is Punjabi?
8. Kicking your gracious host out of his bed. The bed, it should be noted, is a queen size with memory foam and 700-count sheets from Macy's Department Store. The pillows are filled with down-feathers (but not the kind that poke), and there's a 39 inch Visio connected to a jittery satellite dish (damn you transponders 5, 6, and 12). The TV is also connected to PS2. It really would be great to have FIFA in my room, but I can settle for Tony Hawk (Let me know if you want to challenge me to this. Only one jon schutkin could ever beat me). Oh yeah, and then the CPG presents him with the thoughtful ultimatum (old tomato): Get the fuck out or I'll leave.

Please leave. And please do not call, crying, ever again.

beee tee uu: ballerz do not sit on twankys. TI said 24s for a reason.